I remember when I discovered the seduction community.
I found this great ‘system’ that could take me from initial introduction, all the way to sleeping with a girl and it had the entire roadmap planned out…
It all started with negging women. So I learned a few lines, got out into the local bars and clubs, ridiculously excited about all the hot girls I would soon be bedding… and promptly proceeded to offend half the girls in town.
If this story sounds familiar to you, then you’re in the right place.
Personally I don’t like any of the seduction community terms like ‘negging’ – they sound weird and nerdy, like some kind of Dungeons and Dragons game or something.
I prefer the idea of banter – and that’s a place that will give you a lot more success with women. The idea of negging involves essentially giving a girl a backhanded compliment, such as ‘nice nails, are they real?’
The girl then feels the need to qualify herself to you, thus putting you on the pedestal, and her trying to impress you. Or so the theory goes.
The problem with this is that there is a very fine line between this, and simply insulting women. In fact, I spent 6 months of my life going out and insulting women without even realising it. It was only when they consistently kept walking away after 10 minutes or so that I stopped and analysed honestly what was really going on.
Here’s how to correct the problem:
1) Focus on a back and forth banter, rather than backhanded compliments
The idea is that you tease her lightly, and she teases you back. There should be a back and forth feeling, where you can both feel a tension in the air, and that tension increases the more you banter.
This is basic flirting 101. You should both be enjoying the interaction, and both laughing at each other’s witty banter. Compare this with simply walking up to her and being offensive.
2) When she starts asking you rapport style questions, cut out the banter
This was another sticking point for me for ages.
Trouble is, getting a woman laughing is very addictive, so you bust out the funny lines over and over. She thinks ‘this guy is fun, I want to know more about him’, so she says ‘so where are you from?’
But you just respond with a banter line instead of answering the question. She tries again ‘what do you do?’ Again you respond with a witty retort. Eventually she gets fed up and thinks ‘I can’t connect with this guy’ and leaves.
This is a big shame, because all you had to do was answer her questions normally at that point and have a simple conversation with her to show you are a normal guy.
So try this simple 2 step process and see how you get on!
#shorts